TNR Happenings, February 6, 2023
The Tao of TNR
When you understand principles, rather than regurgitate info, you are on the path of the few, not the many. A hidden impediment to great practices is an utter lack of communication skills with so much more emphasis on digital communication. It’s called keyboard courage, where you don’t have to face off with people and can choose to tee off on them behind the cloak of digital darkness. Today, being face to face (not facebook) is even more important than ever due to constraints of brevity (snap chats, instagram, 154 characters). The insistence of copying an MD’s behavior of being aloof, analytical, cold, and uncaring is a modern day curse of the digital generation. Why would you want to copy a sinking ship? When I started my journey in TNR, I thought it was just like Chiropractic School: study, study, regurgitate on the test, and viola, mastery! Boy, was I in for a surprise. When you get the Tao of TNR as an experience, rather than a series of ideas, concepts and INFORMATION to memorize, you will become masterful and experience transformation.
If you’re trying to find a station (tuning knob) on the radio and its not quite there, you turn the volume up, but it’s not the right knob. Trying harder is like turning the knob that we have (volume), not the knob that works (tuning). We need to find the knob that works for us every time, rather than insisting on struggling. Are you bringing your fixed conclusions and assumptions to relationships and repeating the same activity again and again? You have to know, become aware of, or experience what you do that isn’t effective. Information will not do that for you. Repeating what doesn’t work is the definition of futility. Plan to attend the Tao of TNR Training on March 18th!
Love Has No Color News
We have received quite a few cards from the kids on the Fort Peck Reservation for Christmas on the Reservation. The brightness of the colors, gratitude, and words actually shape the kid’s lives. Being loved and recognized at this time in their lives is critical. We’re encouraging them to do their best, share their gifts, and make something of themselves instead of spiraling into the dark, troubled waters of many misguided youth on the Reservation. It may seem small to people who have not made the trek, but you can see it in their faces: “I’m going to make something of myself.“ Our visits inspire kids to aim higher and hold to a higher code of honor instead of standing for nothing.
From the Mind of Miyagi
When things fall apart.
As a members of TNR, you are called upon to act, think, and behave differently than others around you. As you are aware of, you can’t drag anyone along with you on this journey. Not being understood or marginalized is never fun or easy. People around you may refuse to acknowledge just how wise you are. In many instances, mockery and rolled eyes are the norm instead. Who can you talk to about anything of depth? With the tools, transformation, and mastery of TNR, you look at adversity differently than others around you. It’s an opportunity, if you can see through it and not let it paralyze you.
Hoping you only experience certainty, happiness, and things that ask for your permission before they intrude upon your life is just plain unrealistic. Sh&* happens. Instead of running, putting your head in the sand, or becoming angry, face it head on; but don’t expect others to be able to do the same. Can you have a higher resonation and a different base of solutions and not foist it from a righteous and pompous platform on spouses and others? Others are blinded by their lack of resonation and don’t know what you are talking about. Don’t attack them for their shortcomings, work with them as best as you can. You can disagree, but you don’t have to make them wrong. Think of covid here, as your family, friends, or other DCs/NDs went off the deep end!
It’s the number one reason members don’t enter into the realm of Level 2/DCME care. Jumping into the shark infested, frigid water of turmoil brings out the best and the worst of human emotions. Can you endure the ambiguity, the tension between opposites, the paradox, being wrong or being right (who is right, who is wrong?), and keep you head above water. It tests you to the core and most people will not willingly enter the fray at any price. You must become a practitioner with deep roots to help others out of their dilemmas without having it grind you down. Of particular note, if you get in the quicksand with the person (buying into their story, the futility of hope, etc.), you are attempting to pull out, you are now in no position to help that person.
DCME Confidential
Question 1: Why is it that potential practice members with the largest problems often seem to have the smallest levels of commitment?
Answer: I’ve never experienced that. Ha, ha. So many factors affect a person’s ability to commit. Focus on people that are willing and able to right now.
Question 2: Do you have to like the person you are helping with DCME care?
Answer: Acceptance or like is a luxury that you can’t afford. You are there to produce results. Some of your most antagonistic people upon entering change their tunes after completing their care, others don’t. Produce the results and if a relationship emerges, so be it.
