TNR Happenings, April 11, 2022

Have you ever wondered why growth and change are so elusive? Most people actually construct their lives around not being exposed: they won’t venture away from the warm, shallow waters of being an operator, a beta, a people pleaser, an order taker, an ass kisser, or a cube monkey. They marry someone who is completely convinced by their fake identity or oblivious to their true potential that will accept and relegate themselves to a less meaningful and rich life. They are not attracted to owners for good reason: they will hold space for the lie and not see any more potential in them than is necessary to just get by. What a deal.

Many new TNR members are looking for the same thing: the secret concepts of the humanitarian and wealthy about how the world, relationships, money, parenting, etc. work that will catapult them to superstardom. In other words, it’s not who they are that is holding them back; it’s a lack of information, internet gurus, marketing, or secret advertising. Surprise, surprise! In the world of appearance, it’s always about them missing something that someone (guru, priest, social media, government, etc.) must supply them instead of having their inner talents developed and mined to the surface. What a difference between the world of appearance and the world of essence.    

They also have an accompanying story of what is holding them back. My role is not to see it or believe it but instead to show them their true potential. They all have a story told to them by people in authority when they were younger and they just won’t let it go. I feel very akin to an archeologist that digs ‘sh&* up and then weaves them together to guide and inspire rather than drag down and make change and growth impossible. This is done regardless of academics, technique, education, etc. Years ago a former TNR member lamented about how can people take her seriously when she looks like an 11-year old in her bathing suit (a nod to her boyish physique). She was strikingly attractive and the movie she saw in her head was strictly in her head. Everyone else saw a young, attractive Chiropractor in the prime of life. It affected her in every area of her life: confidence, income, intimacy, ability to attract new patients, etc. because of the story she wouldn’t give up.

Other examples of issues females have stories for: having a mustache and sideburns, excessive body hair, size 10 pumps, and a pronounced nose that they believe people are always moving away from so they don’t get poked by the protruding beak. There are no limits to how absurd the stories can get. One thing we can all agree on is the iron-fisted control these stories exert on our present lives even though these things occurred 20 or more years ago.

A couple of insights I have gained over the last 20 years: The member who can muster the courage to drop the story and accept the pushback from their spouse, family, and friends has a chance at growth and change. A person who can grasp that their parents may not have been the end-all, be-all they thought they were when they were younger, will also have a chance to move from where they are to where they want to be. Is it any different with practice members who won’t follow your guidance? Imagine listening to someone who knows nothing about health and following their advice instead of your own 9 years of college prep? You can’t help practice members who won’t drop their stories of what they will and won’t do any more than I can help Chiropractors who won’t drop their stories. 

When it comes to training, most Chiropractors steer clear of one-on-one training and alternately seek a safe, secure seat with 100 of their closest friends. They now love Zoom settings where they can be in their own little world, never being placed in harms’ way, and can hide in clear sight by being a face in the crowd. Our members actually ask to have their layers of old stories chipped away. They want to release the true solid gold that rests beneath the fake, petrified stories that hold what they don’t want in place. How can it happen any other way? 

DCME Confidential