TNR Happenings, July 21, 2025

Who is the person behind the mask? Today, I will attempt to explain the self-sabotaging behavior of ourselves, spouses, family, children, and, yes, of course, practice members who don’t seem to get it. What people present in public and private is a mask of their True Selves. It’s an adaptation or compensation from our younger years that was supposed to protect us from harm, allow us to fit in, and receive some semblance of love (sometimes just crumbs). The problem is that these adolescent or infantile patterns of behavior act to constrict and diminish our adult abilities. They are self-serving, ignore others’ needs, get you in trouble over and over, and when someone you respect says, “Don’t do it”, you’ll do it anyway. It’s like you get taken over by a spell or have been hypnotized.

Even though these childlike or infantile behaviors may or may not have worked when you were younger, they invisibly hold you hostage today. It’s akin to erecting a wall around yourself, and nobody can take it down for you. The mask/wall/barricade is the emotional/mental/spiritual entanglement we carry around with us. It weighs us down, is unseen, severely cripples our capability, and forces us to live plain, ordinary, risk-free, and non-confrontational lives. Our society dictates that we fit in at all costs, even if it means ignoring our authentic selves.

Here’s a secret: the energy to keep this mask going is enormous. Keeping these false narratives alive takes fuel. Attempting to heal a person who is unaware of or uninterested in letting go of these splinter personalities is futile. You will have to kneel at the altar of man-made guidance in the form of substitutions, BSOs, imitations, drugs, technology, and harsh treatments like chemo, radiation, and amputation. After decades of helping people with advanced illness, one thing stands clear to me: removing the mask is the first order of business.

Do you know that people you have a grievance with, don’t like, or want nothing to do with, are more like yourself than you would care to admit? It’s true! When a Miracle Training client comes through the door, their personality doesn’t matter. It’s impersonal, and the True Self will be revealed only after the mask/wall/barricade has been voluntarily discarded. Their personality doesn’t have to align with mine. Whether you like this person or not at a personal level, this persona is going to dissolve anyway, so why bother paying any attention to it? The reason the person is not healing (especially with invisible diseases, mental illness, addiction, PTSD, anxiety, depression, not wanting to live, etc.) is that the energy is being wasted on keeping up a false front. 

When you serve a higher power (whatever that means to you) and selflessly serve others, a sacredness imbues your relationships. It can and does transform anyone, anyplace, anytime. What prevents healing is resistance. It can be with the doctor or the practice member. Judgment blocks healing. Guilt, grief, shame, a sense of worthlessness, and inadequacy in all its forms prevent or consume the energy that should be directed towards healing. Lack of understanding blocks healing. Agreeing with previous limiting beliefs about who should live and who is incurable blocks healing. Even though you can use your linear, rational, analytic mind to play God, it doesn’t make it accurate. Diagnosis is an entity that reeks of duality, opposites, and the limited world of linearity (reason, logic, analysis, etc.) There is a whole world beyond the explainable content. All meaning in your (or anyone else’s) life is derived from the non-linear (context).          

It has been, and continues to be, my privilege and honor to witness authentic True Selves emerge from people in dire circumstances after they have dissolved their masks. Here is an example of one that emerged by moving from his old container to a new, exciting, and adventurous one. He has earned and been given a second chance at life. It’s not just about him; it’s everyone he touches, including his parents, family, and even a deceased brother. 

“Before 2024, I had never met anyone so strong, loving, fierce, and honorable; he showed me that this person is me. A shift toward your goals, and ultimately truth must start somewhere. Sometimes the ever-present solution is right in front of us; it only takes our acknowledgement and allowance to let it shine through.”

His parents described him as antisocial, cold, distant, with few friends, who does not engage with people, is standoffish, unmotivated, and rarely smiles. When he was starting his care, I asked his parents, Do you know how funny and engaging your son is? They looked at me like I was from another planet. Today, the grievances, betrayal, hurt, and lost years have been healed. He now influences his parents…imagine that!

With all of the self-professed enemies in your present and past life, the masks were never dissolved. Nobody is willing to give up their masks voluntarily. There is too much pride, vanity, and EGO! Willing to fight a war instead of dropping the injustice, what was done was wrong, I can’t forgive you, etc. Healing is an actual miracle if allowed to unfold. Our self-centered ego-consciousness chews up so much of our power of life that there is just not enough to supply healing, especially with DCME-type cases. This is not about becoming an analyst, a life coach, or a doctor of psychobabble. It’s about holding space and loving a person entirely, rather than judging, holding grudges, or trying to change their personality to align better with your ideals of a good personality. Masks aside, you are two peas in a pod. Take my word for it, until you experience this for yourself!

Marley & Sunny