TNR Happenings, November 25, 2025
DCME Training Is On January 18th
If you are not joining us for Christmas on the Reservation in a couple of weeks, this will be your next chance to bathe in the community of TNR. You can experience yourself in a dimension, not of the ordinary. You unplug yourself from your devices and lean into yourself and your abilities. The majority can skate through life with nobody holding them accountable, even less giving a darn. Good gets in the way of great. Levels of depth and giving your all are reserved for the few. Some of the quickest in our profession to bail are those who flash their badges of academics. They feel they are too smart to be in the classroom. It’s a strategy of not giving their all to anything in life. Sooner or later, you or a loved one will be in a life-or-death circumstance, and you will have no way of knowing if you are receiving the best from that person. Most of the time, you are not, as they are coasting toward being good enough. It’s called avoidance; in the ordinary world, it’s the soup de jour. You can’t take a practice member any further than you have traveled yourself. Please make plans to join us on January 18th!
Gifts & Donations Deadline Approaching
Please send what you have received this week rather than going past the deadline. Our 20 years of experience have shown that at least 20% of the gifts arrive after we are gone. Yes, common sense says they will receive the gifts the next week, but not receiving a gift while we are there takes the air out of the tires of a kid already under fire. We don’t want to add another disappointment to their endless pile of disappointments. Remember, most of these kids do not have nuclear parents, and the poverty level is rampant. Many do not have any trees at home to put the gifts under. If you have any last-minute questions, speak with Dr. Julie. I have not seen her for a while as she has had her nose buried in her computer while searching for the best deals, free shipping, and battery price.
From the Mind of Miyagi
In case you haven’t looked under the tip of the iceberg and still think the game is more low-quality new patients, here are some snippets of what is going on with each practice member interaction you have.
People who are overwhelmed with life struggle and suffer mightily. They do not feel safe, and when challenged with illness and obstacles, they infantilize and look for someone else to solve their problems. In other words, they assume no responsibility. From paying for their healthcare to doing whatever it takes, they feel entitled that someone else will do the heavy lifting. The government or insurance company will bail them out of this mess, ala the de facto parent. Some of the strategies overwhelmed people utilize are avoidance, arrogance, and compliance. They have a world view of looking for simple solutions to complex problems. They will suffer and act like adolescents rather than buckle down and act in a more adult-like fashion. Someone saying no, or I’ll ask my spouse, is displaying avoidance, plain and simple. What does this have to do with you? You will create much resentment and regret if you use sales, guilt, bait and switch, or BSOs to get them. The relationship will sour very quickly, and you will never satisfy them.
On the other side of the coin are those who believe they have been abandoned. They think they should have a special diagnosis (like the kind you see in TV ads), they can’t be helped, they have a victim mentality, or they have to take drugs for the rest of their lives, almost like a punishment. They are looking for a de facto parent, and you will do just fine. They need copious amounts of self-assurance. “Doctor, do you think I’m doing better, or is my life in the future going to be like it was in the past?”
Adding higher-quality people to your healing community sure beats lowering the bar, making deals, and making exceptions for people who have no intention of doing what needs to be done. Having the ability to replace is better than feeling like you are being held hostage by low-quality people who don’t respect you or what you do.
Miracle Training
Don’t forget what a person is going through, even though you aren’t going through the same circumstances. Don’t feel sorry for them; however, you must hold space for them without judgment. Get rid of the bum won’t cut it. Their jobs and households are often on hold, as are relationships, finances, etc. Many people blame themselves for the illness. Then, the levels of shame and guilt escalate and serve to make matters worse. One of the things people realize very quickly is the depth of their support system during troubled times. A few days of the flu are different than an illness that is reluctant to leave. People get exposed when the 4 Ds come to town. Disease, death, depression, and divorce shine a light on current relationships. If your relationships are strong and your roots are deep, you’ll access a strength you never knew you had. If you live a ‘good time’ life, it will fall apart when the darker, deeper waters invade your life. The more superficial a person is, the more time is spent surfing, entertaining, and doing what everybody else does. Then, righting the ship will be more difficult.
DCME Confidential
Question 1: I overheard my DCME client talking baby talk with his mother. My client is 26 years old and still lives at home. He has yet to find the perfect job. hat should I do?
Answer: There is nothing to be done. You now have the explanation for why you are not achieving results with this guy.
Question 2: My DCME seems to have a PhD in resistance. They disagree with everything I say, have a whole story of bullshit, and this goes on endlessly. What’s going on?
Answer: Resistance is in direct proportion to fear. PERIOD! It’s never about what it’s about. Don’t react to the tip of the iceberg; what’s underneath and hidden is what matters.
Marley
