Sacred Relationship Experience
Yikes, it’s less than a month away. There are still a handful of unclaimed tickets left. The allopathic way of existence says that there is nothing important enough to care for and nurture unless it’s in flames: ignore it unless it’s in crisis. No wonder the sacred is in so few relationships. That’s how older people got sucked into voluntarily watching the negative TV news which is merely Below the Line programming that becomes addictive. With the things that matter, this orientation causes so much chaos in marriage, parenting, and our practices. Are you willing to put in some effort now with some uncomfortableness, in exchange for a deeper, richer relationship for the greater good of your relationship? After all, if your relationships aren’t worth your best effort, what is?
From the Mind of Miyagi
The Man Who Couldn’t Build a Hockey Rink
I received lots of great feedback regarding the man who got exposed because he didn’t have what it took to build his son an outdoor hockey rink. People love giving advice about things they know nothing about. Monday morning quarterbacks are a great example and how much salary a certain professional athlete is worth. Like a bank teller, they are counting money that doesn’t belong to them, so why are they talking about it? It’s not theirs and they aren’t owners, they are superficial fans observing an event, not being in the event. We get exposed in so many areas of our lives from marriage to disease, conflict in relationships, kids at risk, betrayal, loss of love, aging parents. When you get exposed, what will you do? Most cry and run to technology, real doctors (MDs), and social media to plead their cases. People love to milk sympathy by talking about problems as if they don’t have a solution. The feedback you will get is from fellow problem embracers, not solution people. The reality is there are solutions but they happen to be beyond their resonation. So because they can’t see them, they don’t believe they exist. Technology (a promissory note) can’t save you. Know-how can and does. The people in supposed authority say we’ll look into it, do some research on it, it’s an uncovered expense, sorry about that. We see it every day in our practices with, “I can’t afford it”, “I’ll have to go home and ask my spouse”, “Does insurance cover it?”, etc. We see people endure agony and misery if it’s outside of their expertise, which it usually is. They accept no and what can’t be done routinely and become paralyzed yet again.
The man who couldn’t build a hockey rink thought he could build a rink. Just like people think they know how to be healthy. They don’t! He wanted the approval of his son and the admiration of his wife. He has good carpentry skills and the appearance of the rink is sturdy. Appearance is kind of like talking about disease, symptoms, and the problem. You sound so important and so intelligent doing what you’ve been programmed to do by society since you gulped your first breath. You’re commenting on the problem, it’s not the solution. He must have thought to himself, “Anyone can do it, right?” WRONG! What he found out is he knew zero about making ice, the functional component of the rink. It looks good (the appearance) from the outside, its essence is fatally flawed.
He doesn’t know about a 6 mile an hour wind that is necessary to make ice and that you can’t freeze 8 inches of water because it must be layered and build up slowly. Instead, he got frustrated and has allowed this eyesore to remain. When will he take it down? Where is his spouse to apply the pressure to pack in his aborted effort to do something that exposed him as not being as good as he thought he was? Don’t think this doesn’t happen in other back yards: it’s happening in your neighborhood, as you read this.
Practice tip of the week
Stop doing everything by yourself and ask for some cooperation. Once you’ve been identified as capable, a mysterious event happens all around you: if things don’t get done, others know you will do them because you can’t help yourself. People around you know this, so they stop doing their part and do just enough to get by. After all, as a DC, you are very capable and they know it. Your practice members slack off on their recommendations and you say okay (meow) as you look the other way while agreeing with their excuses. Your spouse says the garage can’t be cleaned because the moon is in Capricorn. “Okay honey, do it after your hunting, fishing, playing video games, and a ride on your motorcycle.”
Your CAs know darn well that if they don’t do it, you’ll come in on the weekend, away from your family, and complete the paperwork and administration minutia. “It’s okay, I don’t have a family, hobbies, fitness goals, etc.” The parents of your kids’ friends know you will bake the cupcakes, staying up past midnight to do it. None of them have practices, but they know you’ll do it anyway.
Stop the madness! Start asking for cooperation from others around you. Just because you’re capable, you’re enabling and crippling those around you because they are not stepping up. Those around you will never become capable or venture into the unknown. You need cooperation to grow. You need cooperation to free yourself from the spirit-draining tasks others are supposed to do and don’t. Soon it becomes a lifestyle. It’s got to stop to allow you to be the DOCTOR, not the fixer of other people’s messes around you. Stop accepting excuses and welcome cooperation into your life.
Love Has No Color News
We’ve announced our Boot Camp/Fun Day dates: August 6th to the 8th. Check out the lower airline ticket fees now that they’ve built a new airport in Williston, ND. It may be worth your while to purchase tickets early as the prices are considerably less than the previous years. For some reason, the Williston, ND ticket was the most expensive continental US ticket available. Not anymore! Is this the year you are going to bring VIP practice members and family?
Question 1: I just received an email from one of my DCMEs saying it causes too much anxiety coming to my office so many times per week. They were wondering if the frequency could be cut down or if I could come to their house to administer the adjustment?
Answer: NO! Either they are getting pressure from their spouse, in-laws, etc. or something in your relationship has slipped. They are losing altitude fast.
Question 2: What do you do with a DCME who has prepaid and keeps missing appointments?
Answer: You confront the situation and don’t ignore it. Getting paid is only part of the conditions for restoring health. Are you the kind of personal trainer that only wishes to get paid and not be concerned with results (business model of profit over people) or do you utilize the humanitarian model that puts people before profit? It’s always win-win or it’s nothing at all. You can’t guarantee a resolution of illness, you can guarantee your best effort. It’s enough to change the world!
Spotted on the Trailcam